Chronic emotional turmoil is manifested physiologically through fatigue, pain, and illness- all of which exacerbate the disconnect between the body and the psyche. Using self-portraiture to investigate this destabilized perception of self, my work realizes the dysphoria experienced as a response to the loss of one’s autonomy. Slippery terrains of oil and pigment accumulate to build delicate and permeable bodies that flickers in and out of representation to illustrate the subconscious disconnect of body and self. Emphasized by dysmorphic perspective and movement of lights and shadows, the distinction between reality and perception collapses into paint. Liquefied bodily barriers reveal sites of touch and trauma and healing, painted as an act of reclamation in power and pleasure.